Life’s hardest choices

Life sometimes demands the hardest of choices. And the problem with these choices is everyone has an opinion on what you should do and they always think they are right. Often I myself don’t know if it is the right choice. Sometimes I feel like I am at a crossroad. Both paths will take me to the same place, but one is a more difficult. Ok, by now I’m sure you’re all bored with my philosophy. So here was the choice.

I was going to try to work things out with my husband if he would let go of his other woman. He was supposed to decide today… But the closer the date got, the more pain and questioning I had. I don’t know how to love him anymore. The way I loved him before just isn’t working. There was so much betrayal. And I don’t feel like he can give me what I need from a husband. I’m just not ok romantically right now. My heart isn’t whole.

The only one I am clinging to right now is Jesus. He is my Rock, my Sword, and my Shield. I know I can overcome anything with Him, but this is not something that is going to be fixed over night. It hurts, I’ll be honest. My ex is hurt too, but I just can’t. And I know people are going to question my decision. I know are few were shocked I would even take him back. I had to try though, but kissing him didn’t feel right. Being so angry at him sometimes (and often for no reason) didn’t feel right.

I don’t know if we’ll be able to save our marriage in the future. Or maybe we’ll both find happiness with other people. I just know everyone has to make this decision on their own. Some women are able to repair their marriage. Some can’t. But it is each of our own choices and only we can make that choice for us and our children who are often caught in the middle.

If you are a single mom, recent or veteran, if you are thinking about going back to your husband, remember that it is your choice. You are encouraged to seek advice if you like, but make sure that advice is sound. Trusted unbiased friends, pastors, counselors, there are people to help and you are not alone. Make the choice that you can live with, not what society tells you to. Now, if he is beating you DON’T GO BACK. But otherwise, the choice is yours.

About Christina

Hi! My name is Christina. I'm a mom to an amazing little boy and a sweet little girl, Wife, Christian, writer, avid reader, and Librarian. I'm very passionate about life and I hope that my posts may help someone out there who needs a little pick me up or some reassurance.
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7 Responses to Life’s hardest choices

  1. soph1003 says:

    Hi Christina. That’s unfortunate that you’re going through this, but hey, everything happens for a reason. Maybe there is some real happiness that awaits you somewhere down the road. Following your heart is definitely the choice to make.

    I would like to connect with you 🙂 You can find me at


    Liked by 1 person

  2. lovessiamese says:

    Hi, Christina. I am so sorry you’re having to go through this. Like you said, you are the only one who can decide what to do. It is never my intention to come across as having all of the answers. The only one who has all of them is Jesus. Your faith in Him will see you through whatever lies ahead. I’ll be praying for you, for God to give you His wisdom, strength, and grace, and that whatever the decision is will be right for you and your little guy. I care and I’d like to stay in touch. My e-mail: God bless.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks lovessiamese! You are so right about Jesus. He is amazing! I know that He will not lead me astray and I know I can always rely on Him. I’ll save your e-mail and send you a message later this evening. God bless, and Happy Thanksgiving!


  3. lovessiamese says:

    Hope you also have a Happy Thanksgiving. Do you have family and/or friends nearby you can share the holiday with?


  4. Yes ma’am. I had my son for half the day, and my grandmother and friend are here with me. Thanks so much.


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